Hey Joseph, I'm super sorry to be looking at this so late and finally giving you feedback, but the animatic I think is just to get the visual idea across. We can always change some things once filming comes about. -I think just with what the tutors said in the first meeting to change some dialogue. Rather then 'it was my fault', change it to 'it should've been me, not you' type thing. Again with trying to keep the husband on the left side of the screen and the wife on the right side, in the first shot just have the door to the left of the screen and the husband walk left to right.
-It's not clear that the earthquake is only happening in the mirror world, but that would be a bit difficult to show in this. Maybe just having the contents in the mirror shake a bit.
-Also with the shots where she's fading away and his reflection appears, we would see more of his body since he stands up. Also when he sees the newspaper, it's still the same shot from when we see his reflection. So he'd be looking into the mirror finally seeing himself, then he'd look down and see the corner of the picture sticking out.
-Finally I'm not too sure about the final shot. Rather than him looking at the camera and smiling, I think he should still be looking down and smiling, like still looking at the photo. Maybe showing a shot of him holding the photo and smiling at it. If he's smiling at the camera, then it would seem like we're trying to make a connection with the husband and the audience which is unintentional.
I know that you don't have time to change these, but we'll just keep these in mind for when we do filming :) Awesome job though Joseph! Came together nicely!!
Hey Joseph, I'm super sorry to be looking at this so late and finally giving you feedback, but the animatic I think is just to get the visual idea across. We can always change some things once filming comes about.
ReplyDelete-I think just with what the tutors said in the first meeting to change some dialogue. Rather then 'it was my fault', change it to 'it should've been me, not you' type thing.
Again with trying to keep the husband on the left side of the screen and the wife on the right side, in the first shot just have the door to the left of the screen and the husband walk left to right.
-It's not clear that the earthquake is only happening in the mirror world, but that would be a bit difficult to show in this. Maybe just having the contents in the mirror shake a bit.
-Also with the shots where she's fading away and his reflection appears, we would see more of his body since he stands up. Also when he sees the newspaper, it's still the same shot from when we see his reflection. So he'd be looking into the mirror finally seeing himself, then he'd look down and see the corner of the picture sticking out.
-Finally I'm not too sure about the final shot. Rather than him looking at the camera and smiling, I think he should still be looking down and smiling, like still looking at the photo. Maybe showing a shot of him holding the photo and smiling at it. If he's smiling at the camera, then it would seem like we're trying to make a connection with the husband and the audience which is unintentional.
I know that you don't have time to change these, but we'll just keep these in mind for when we do filming :) Awesome job though Joseph! Came together nicely!!